I was going to write about this couple I met last weekend...trust me it would have been interesting...but I have this daunting flu which doesn't go away and quite frankly I have lost the plot and can't remember what was so interesting about them that I was planning to write about...so excuse me as I blab along among a series of coughs and sneezes....and huffs and puffs as they say…!!!

I was reviewing a conversation I had with a friend yesterday, as I drove home, I thought to myself some of us chase challenges. Others queue up to watch horror films or to ride roller coasters. They seek the thrill of fear, the excitement of stress or the engagement of being up against an intense difficulty. It's a shame really, that I can't 'rent out' my current situation. Someone, somewhere, would probably love to be in it, if only for the sense of 'edge' that it supplies. No seriously...I am not complaining...don't get me wrong...just wondering when I get to relax...when would the tension resolve itself ? ....soon I hope.

We all need friends...Don't we? Without them, we would have nobody to criticise us, confuse us, help us waste time and give us dubious advice. Enemies, you see, just can't get close enough to create such trouble. I am now kind of starting to wonder what my friendships , particularly a friendship is all about. If a certain someone is truly on my side, they have a funny way of showing it. Perhaps time will prove me wrong and I will realise that I have worried for no reason...Perhaps at some point I will get some clarification and confirmation and understand much more about my friends behaviours... and maybe that will make me feel much better and learn how much key relationship really means...may be I will be able to distinguish between the real things...with time!

They say, 'Patience is a virtue', as if they are trying to sell the stuff to us. It is not, though, some optional lifestyle accessory. It is a screaming necessity. Without it, we can achieve very little and enjoy even less. Besides which, if they really want to convince us of its desirability, they should describe it as a vice. Ultimately, we are all much more attracted to what's naughty than we are to what's good for us. Maybe I shouldn't worry, perhaps there really is no great need to make some enormous effort. Perhapas I should just wait and what I need will come to me...!!! ya right! ha!

Why are intelligence tests so difficult? Because they have been designed by some rather stupid people, who feel that you can measure a person's merit by their ability to perform a bunch of unimaginative calculations that are far better suited to a computer. But we are humans, not machines. We have depth, sensitivity, wit, wisdom, hope, faith, compassion and creativity. They count for far, far more. I keep having this argument with mum these days that it's not our brains we need to listen to ... it's our heart...But she seems to be under the illusion that intelligence, decency and frankly 'adam boodan' has a direct relationship with a piece of paper that is either your bachelor or doctorate!!!....Please Mother...was all I could say today to end that argument....although I am pretty sure it will crop up again!

People can get hold of the wrong end of the stick for a variety of reasons. They may misunderstand what is being said. Or they may be so excited by a particular word, in a particular sentence, that they can hear nothing else. Sometimes, wishful thinking gets the better of them. Sometimes, fear or prejudice compromises their ability to be analytical. Sometimes I get the feeling that I just maybe one of those people!

Perhaps that is because illusions delight and excite us. We like to witness them and we like to create them too. That's why we put so much attention into packaging. We think hard about how we present ourselves to others, how we dress, how we speak, how we send out certain signs and signals. As if impressions count. Is it, strictly speaking, true? Perhaps not. But nor is it totally false. The key to success these days seems to involve being a good spin doctor.

What makes life truly worth living? What's the best, highest, most wonderful thing a human can aspire to? And, how good does it have to get... and for how long? There are some who believe that if you can manage to spend just a minute of your life, in a state of deep and true enlightenment, the richness of the experience will compensate for decades of darkness...This maybe...but there are so many '?'s !

"Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn." We all know the line from Gone with the Wind. Occasionally, we may utter it, or say something similar. Yet we tend to see detachment as an unsatisfactory sentiment. We want to be engaged, involved, connected and committed. We feel that to be cold is to be callous. Perhaps so, but to be heated is to be helpless. But maybe it is wiser inorder to be a force for good , to be able to stand back and look at life objectively.

Can we really make a difference if we try? Or are we like children in a car on a fairground ride? We press on an imaginary accelerator. We stamp on a make-believe brake. We kid ourselves that our actions are having an impact but things would be just the same if we were to sit perfectly still. Now I am not trying to say that we are powerless. We all need to know the difference between the things we can change and the things we can't. Perhaps this is not just so that we can be spared unnecessary angst, there is a practical purpose. If we use up our vital time and energy pursuing impossible objectives, we will end up wasting the resources that might otherwise have been put to a truly constructive use. But if we seek success perhaps we should take energy away from a pointless pursuit and give it all to a worthwhile cause...only if everyone could undrestand that!

Perhaps mice compete fiercely with other mice. Perhaps they argue about whose whiskers are longest, and whose noses twitch the most. But to us, they are still just mice. We humans also spend a lot of time weighing ourselves up against others. We wonder what they've got that we haven't... and vice versa. Yet the only folk on this earth who are truly worth looking up to, are the one's who don't look up to (or down on) anyone.

Isn't it strange how the wheel of destiny turns so that those who you used to dream of the most are now emerge in your subconscious as nightmares!...So that you catch yourself waking up sweating and terrified....ummm....I don't like where
this is all going...

Still shaken by last nights nightmare, I did something I rarely ever do...flipped to the horoscope section of the paper this morning; In big fonts under Aries it said:

Someone appreciates you more than you realise. Someone cares more than you know. Someone wants to help you and this someone has more power than you perhaps give them credit for. Don't feel obliged to struggle on alone, or to prove that you can cope without help. The assistance you need will always be available if only you can find the humility to ask for it. Work generally on the assumption that your plan is a wise one and that you are in the right place at the right time. For it is, and you are!

Well, that is totally irrelevant to the dream...but perhaps a relief...the trouble is; I am struggling to identify the person of whom the cosmic powers so confidently talk about!

- Why are we all so stupid?
Because if we were any smarter, we'd be too clever for our own good.
- Why are we all so ignorant?
Because if we knew any more, we'd have nothing left to learn.
- Why are we all so crazy?
Because if we were truly sane, we couldn't cope!

I guess I'm just trying to point out that perhaps there are good reasons why the world is as it is. Of course, we should try to change it for the better whenever ( which most of us will do anyway!)...we can but we should also remember that the quickest way to bring about an improvement, is to start liking whatever we have previously felt inclined to object to....ya ya ya!

Our minds have one agenda, our hearts another. Rarely, if ever, do the two completely coincide. Our heads though, have a nasty habit of speaking on our heart's behalf. They get away with this subterfuge because their voices are so much louder and more 'reasonable' sounding. Hearts don't shout, they whisper, at least most of the time. And when they do speak up, they make statements that pay no regard to the restrictions of reality. True hearts though, are always pure, giving, generous and kind. Heads fight battles, hearts seek peace. ... I truely believe this statement.

First day of autumn...I took the tunnel instead of the street level...and listened to the guy playing ' Que Sera Sera.....' I had missed him!

When I was just a little girl,
I asked my mother, "What will I be?
Will I be pretty? Will I be rich?"
Here's what she said to me:

Que sera, sera,
Whatever will be, will be.
The future's not ours to see,
Que sera, sera,
What will be, will be.

When I was just a child in school,
I asked my teacher, "What shall I try?
Should I paint pictures?
Should I sing songs?"
This was her wise reply:

Que sera, sera,
Whatever will be, will be.
The future's not ours to see,
Que sera, sera,
What will be, will be.

When I grew up and fell in love,
I asked my lover, "What lies ahead?
Will we have rainbows day after day?"
Here's what my lover said:

Que sera, sera,
Whatever will be, will be.
The future's not ours to see,
Que sera, sera,
What will be, will be.

Now I have children of my own,
They ask their mother, "What will I be?
Will I be pretty? Will I be rich?"
I tell them tenderly:

Que sera, sera,
Whatever will be, will be.
The future's not ours to see,
Que sera, sera,
What will be, will be.

Vitamin C does not stay in the human body very long. That's why it is important to eat a daily supply of fruit. Vitamin B12, by comparison, needs only to be replenished periodically. As with physical nutrients, so with psychological supports. There are some 'ego boosts' that wear off unless we get them again, and again or pretty frequent. There are others that we need only once in a while...well enough of that...ya ya I got my share of ego boosted yesterday...happy!!!
We have had wonderful weather here in London on the eve of the Autumn. We had 24 degrees sun, we had thunder and lightening and loads of rain and sunshine again and rain again...so how do you expect anyone to resist walking under the first drops of the autumn rain?? No matter what Einstein might have said " Don't walk under the rain unless you are sure some one cares"!

Well don't know about 'sure', but I certainly 'hope' someone does!

Do you remember when you first learned long division? Wasn't it satisfying when you could make one figure go into another an exact number of times? And wasn't it aggravating when there was a little something left over? Remainders seemed so untidy. Silly, irritating things that served no purpose other than to act as a reminder of some failed quest for harmony and completion. But then again isn't it true what they say 'Nothing lasts forever'?
Some things though, drag on for an awfully long time. We can easily begin to assume that they will never change. Of course, the moment we adopt this attitude, we lose some of our ability to make a difference. That's fine if we are happy with things as they are. But if we really would like to have a different experience, we must never decide that it simply isn't possible. Perhaps if we are more alert in reaching out and grabbing the opportunities, they might just fall right into our hands!

We are taught to feel that everything in life has to have an explanation. We must always have a reason for choosing one thing over another. In reality though, we are all creatures of instinct. Inwardly, we sum up every situation we ever encounter in a flash. It takes less than a nanosecond for our psychic radar to decide whether or not it likes something or someone. Our intellect then scurries along behind, attempting to catch up by justifying whatever it is that we have felt!

Some people manage to live two-dimensional lives. They don't think about very much for very long. They take everything and everyone at face value. They usually accept whatever they encounter without criticism. On the odd occasion when they feel obliged to complain, they are interested neither in nuance nor explanation. If things are bad, they are totally bad and never mind why...Sometimes I really want to be like those people!

Wow...I managed to put two links on this...woohoo...!!

Some things give us pleasure and satisfaction. Others are stressful and uncomfortable. Yet both experiences have something in common. We know where we stand with them. Life's most peculiar (and often troublesome) moments tend to involve situations we just can't make up our mind about. It's those bitter-sweet flavours that fox us. They attract us in one way, repel us in another. Whenever we find ourselves saying one thing whilst doing another, it is usually because we are somehow caught up in such a double-sided scenario. Perhaps it is better and wiser when we can't make a clear decision , don't even try. Is it easier to accept that some questions are not easily answered? Woud we be wiser to make an allowance for that?

When people talk about smart scientists, they normally mention Einstein. He was indeed a clever cookie, by saying things like:
Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new
We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them
So too, was a chap called Werner Heisenburg. He is most famous for his Uncertainty Principle. He found that the outcome of any experiment will always be influenced by the presence of an observer, no matter how impartial or uninvolved that witness tries to be. As in physics, so in life. Apparently we influence things and people just by looking at them so pehaps we shouldn't underestimate the impact we have on certain things. But so if these people were all right in theories about life and physics...and if Einstein was right about Gravitation not being responsible for people falling in love...then so...tell me...what is?

There's a problem with trying to read a map in a moving vehicle. By the time you have worked out where you are in relation to where you want to go, you are somewhere else! But then you have to begin the whole process all over again. And, of course, it is going to have the same outcome. We encounter the same difficulty whenever we try to chart a course through life. Circumstances never stand still. By the time we have worked out what's really going on in our world, it is no longer happening in quite the same way. How, then, can we be sure of making the right choices? Do we go by our heart? Or by the book?